Why MD/PhD?

Why do I want to be a doctor and a scientist? As I wrote in my previous blog entry, I want a meaningful life. To me, the best way to achieve the goal seems to be the combination of the dual identities. I think being a doctor really gives me the most direct opportunity to make a difference in both my own and another person's life. The patients teach me lessons in an unspoken way. Watching life and death has made me realize nothing can last forever and forced me to seriously ponder on the purpose of life. I like to think about this, because unless you really understand that life is like a flash of light, you will not treasure it, and unless you think hard about the purpose of your existence, your life will not be meaningful. Furthermore, I found I have the gift to inspire patients even without any medical knowledge. Seriously, I think medicine is really not so much about learning how to prescribe drugs and memorizing human anatomy; the best cure is often psychological. The best cure is when a patient develops himself or herself a strong desire to live and a belief that life is beautiful and there's something in life that's worth fighting for, despite all the sufferings and dismay . A doctor, being blessed with the knowledge and insights into the secrecy of human life, is the most suited person to lead the patients toward this path. A doctor has to learn how to invoke such inner strength within patients. No matter how miserable a situation is, a man must have hopes. I know this from many hardships I have endured.

There are many ways to explore the nature of our existence. I can think philosophically, and I can read books on it, but I think I will choose the path of science. I'm good at quantitative reasoning and working in a systematic way, and I really like to understand things from the most fundamental level. Thermodynamics determines the structures of proteins, and protein structures determine their functions. It's intellectually satisfying to think about everything in life with this bottom-up approach, for it provides a unifying framework of understanding things. After all, aren't we all seeking the ultimate reality and truth that explain everything?